Pictured: Saving the world, 9 minutes at a time.
I am not a morning person. Never have been. Probably never will be. Beds can be so comfy and warm, while offshore winds and head high dawn patrol barrels aren’t exactly a daily occurrence in Southern California. The issue runs so deep through my veins my parents still tell childhood stories of how we used to battle to the death, just to get me out of bed on Christmas morning. Sure, I’m completely capable of waking up “early” and starting the day strong. But at least one day out of the week I lack the discipline to jump out of bed as soon as my iPhone starts spewing that tragically optimistic song of the day.
This leads to guilt. Nobody really likes missing out on the beginning of a brand new day, getting a late start, and playing catch up until the sun sets. That’s a whole new level of stress to deal with. Because other first world problems aren’t tragic enough.
“What am I doing with my life? You get the same 24 hours as Oprah, bro. The Rock would be so disappointed in you. He went to the gym, visited three children’s hospitals, and pitched and sold a new television show to two major networks by the time you had breakfast.” This is the kind of inner monologue that comes with waking up at least an hour later than planned.
But now there’s no reason to feel guilty about a sluggish start. Somebody found an effective way to use your laziness for the betterment of the world. It’s called Zooster, and as of this fall it will make you feel better about not being a morning person. The mobile app is actually a really simple concept, taking $1 for every time you hit snooze or dismiss your alarm altogether and donating it to a wildlife conservation fund. The charitable alarm clock wakes you up with sounds of the animal kingdom; lion roars, dolphin squeaks, or whatever animal your poor habit is now funding. Hit snooze and that animal gets $1 out of your pocket. One good deed of the day crossed off the list before you even roll out of the sheets. Top that, Oprah.
“Donating to wildlife conservation used to be about writing a check,” says one of the app’s creators, Russell Hawkins. “Now someone can curate the programs they most want to support and have an interactive experience with the animals.” More than just picking an animal and emptying out your wallet, the app actually teaches its users about the partnered charities and conservation statuses of the animals you choose.
Now go take a nap or something.
