“All eyez on me.” Photo: Facebook
This might be the coolest thing that happened this week. And by cool I mean we have a new frontrunner for 2017’s Darwin Awards. But in all fairness, an Aussie rapper going by the blasphemous alias, 2Pec, should have been a major red flag for the rest of us a long time ago anyway.
Terry Peck is a 33-year old Australian man who is “trying to rap battle Eminem at the moment, but he [Eminem] won’t come down to Australia to have a go.” And yes, that’s an actual thing Peck said about his hip-hop career – although the humble brag was really just a sidenote while granting interviews to local reporters who really couldn’t have cared less about his bars than the $621 dinner tab he just tried to ditch.
Earlier this week, 2Pec was dining at Queensland’s Omeros Bros Seafood Restaurant where he reportedly mowed down two lobster mornays, 21 vodka oyster shooters, and a baby octopus. The fancy and expensive dinner was then washed down with “a bunch of Coronas” before escaping the restaurant and sending it straight to the ocean. Perhaps he thought he’d entered international waters and found safe haven, but police teamed up with local lifeguards to chase 2Pec down by jet ski, eventually catching him and arresting him in the water, according to The Telegraph.
Just like everything in life, there’s always room for improvement. And this tale is no exception. Peck was charged with two counts of obstructing police and one count of stealing, which he obviously had a rock-solid defense case for. “The lobster was a bit overcooked,” Peck told local reporters after leaving court. On the scene, Peck had claimed a friend was going into labor on the beach, which was why he rushed out of the restaurant and into the water. “I couldn’t find [my friend] and I was going to pay the bill if I found my wallet, but I lost everything,” he told police.
“There was an oyster shell in the oyster and [a restaurant staff member] said he was going to take care of the bill. He said he was going to get the bill. I told them to tell the chef it was overcooked. Eventually, police came and I went for a swim,” he said, proving this was all just a misunderstanding. He’d just needed to swim off all the vodka oyster shots and Caronas.
So much awesome.
