Can you make it? Photo: Kenji Croman
It’s dark as hell in here, but I can see the light.
Up ahead, pretty far from where I’m at. Just an oval sliver of non-black really, outside of which lies a glory I can’t quite fathom. I think I can make it. Just gotta go fast. Faster. Fast enough to push right through this flume and get out of all this dark, bumpy, wet chaos. Gotta keep my shoulders angled, my knees cocked. Ignore those crevices and ripples fissuring along all that wall and all that lip. Focus on the light.
I can hear people. I can’t see them, but I can hear them. Cheering me on, “Yeah! Come on! You can do it!” But something keeps pulling me back. My leash dragging? Did I lose a fin? Then I realize I’m hugging the wall too tight so I let go, crouch into a ball, and suddenly I’m back in the game. The light gets wider and closer, foam blasts my eyes, and just like Dora, I’m shooting for my life, man!
It’s all going great until some lady cuts the cord and slaps my ass.
