Oh, man. Here we go. There’s perhaps nothing worse than mainstream media outlets’ coverage of surfing. For the most part, anchors and TV personalities don’t surf. And that becomes painfully obvious when they start to bust out terms like “Hang loose,” while awkwardly throwing a shaka, or ending a newsworthy story involving surfing with a “cowabunga” for good measure.
It’s no secret that the powers that be at the WSL have been on a bit of a professionalization binge – seeking to bridge the gap between the sport and mainstream sports fans. Just take a look at how you can now buy your favorite surfer’s jersey with their last name and number on the back on the WSL website. Whether the WSL courted ESPN to get John John on SportsCenter at Night, or it was the other way around, the result is an achingly bad interview that treats surf more as side show than legitimate sport.
John waltzes on set fully clothed with a board under his arm – no doubt an idea fashioned by the producers so non-surfing viewers at home could understand who this curly blonde haired kid is and what he’s doing on the show. The whole thing is comical because it’s nothing more than a prop. There’s no legitimate interest in board design or discussion about the board led by host Neil Everett.
To make matters worse, Everett comes out wearing flip flops, board shorts, and a North Shore Lifeguard long sleeve. The shirt is a nice nod to North Shore Lifeguards, guys who dedicate their lives to saving others and have a long lineage as accomplished watermen. But, the shorts, shirt, flip flops thing (also probably thought up by producers) is a failed attempt to “look the part.” Even John John seems to notice. “Are you savin’ people today?” he asks.
Imagine if Everett were interviewing Tom Brady, and he came out with a football under his arm and Everett came out wearing a jersey and face paint. That’s how absurd this whole interview feels from the onset.
The conversation isn’t bad, but it’s not good. John discusses what it was like to win the Eddie, what it’s like to be world champ. But in between, he finds himself explaining elements of competitive surfing like a surf fan might explain to their grandpa at Thanksgiving. “[The Eddie] only runs when the waves at Waimea are really big,” says John John. “Hawaii is kind of the center of surfing,” he explains.
Everett also finds himself asking what certain situations feel like. “What’s it feel like on a wave that big,” he asks about Waimea. “Do you fear when you’re on the water? Or do you fear when you see what you did on a videotape?” he wonders later. He might as well be talking to an alien that competes on a crazy con-flabbin’ whirly bird contraption that’s beyond comprehension.
Again, I say, no self-respecting sports anchor would ask an athlete what it feels like to accomplish the mundane in a general sense. No one is asking what it feels like to catch a ball, run really fast, dunk, or skate on ice. One might wonder what it felt like in a particular moment during a particular match or game, but this is different. Everett’s boyish curiosity about surfing reveals a lack of understanding and implicit lack of acceptance of surfing into the pantheon of main stream athletic endeavors in the United States. Surfing will forever be sideshow. A curiosity to most, but never one worth taking the time to fully understand.
