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Johnny Utah

Johnny Utah

Former Eff Bee Eye Agent/Quarterback Punk

Johnny Utah Point Break North Shore
Comedy

Johnny Utah Reviews North Shore: ‘That Movie Doesn’t Hold a Candle to Point Break’

4 min read
Pro Surfer Throws First Ever Quad Cork on a Fingerboard
Comedy

Pro Surfer Throws First Ever Quad Cork 1800 on a Fingerboard

3 min read
keanu reeves peeing in wave pool
Comedy

10 Times Johnny Utah Broke the Biggest Stories in the Surf World

3 min read
Comedy

Guinness World Records Adopts Hawaiian Scale; Biggest Wave Ever Surfed Now Officially 2 Feet

2 min read
Comedy

Surf Pub Geotags Secret Spot on Instagram; Following Dawn Patrol Sees 1K Surfers

3 min read
Comedy

Instagram Commenter Orders Board In Exact Dims as Kelly Slater, Surfs Like Kelly Slater

3 min read
Comedy

The Race to Become First Mountain to Open Is Getting Ridiculous: Sierra Resort Runs Lifts in Dry Conditions

4 min read
Mick Fanning Kelly Slater Wave Pool Surf Ranch
Comedy

Freshwater Pro Called Off After Shark Spotted; Mick Fanning Summoned for Backup

3 min read
Comedy

New Scientific Research Confirms Waves Were, In Fact, ‘Better Yesterday’

5 min read
Tim Marshall/Unsplash
Comedy

New Study Finds That When You Say ‘One More Wave’ in Your Head, Ocean Knows to Shut Down

3 min read
Comedy

Global Neon Neoprene Shortage Sends Parents of Lowers Groms Into a Tizzy

3 min read
Comedy

Unnamed Multinational Wholesale Corporation to Sell $99 Foam Hydrofoils

2 min read
Pro surfing is the best sport for your dad to fall asleep watching
Comedy

Report: Pro Surfing Overtakes Golf as Best Sport for Your Dad to Fall Asleep Watching

3 min read
keanu reeves peeing in wave pool
Comedy

New Study: ‘More Waves in Pools Than Waves in the Ocean By 2050’

4 min read
Breaking: American Ex-Pat Surfers Crowdfund Trump-Esque Border Wall to Keep 'Kooks Out' of Mexico
Surf

Breaking: Expat Surfers Crowdfund Trump-Esque Border Wall to Keep ‘Kooks’ Out of Mexico

3 min read
Man in front of Malibu wall
Comedy

Self-Appointed ‘Emperor of Malibu’ Wants to Rebuild the Malibu Wall; Promises ‘Valley Kooks’ Will Pay For It

3 min read
owen wright in a tube with money
Comedy

Man Passes Up Middle Management Promotion to Focus on Fantasy Surf Roster

4 min read
Jake Kelley surfing Hypto Kryto at Cloudbreak
Comedy

New WSL Mandate: Big Wave World Tour Must Be Surfed Entirely On 5’4″ Hypto Kryptos

2 min read
Kelly Slater anti-aging serum
Comedy

Kelly Slater Releases Organic Chia Seed-Based Anti-Aging Serum; Plans to Surf Competitively Until 2119

2 min read